Bullying affects approximately 20% of high school students annually, often stemming from previous abuse, insecurity, or peer pressure, but professional therapeutic intervention can help both victims and bullies break the cycle through evidence-based coping strategies and trauma-informed counseling approaches.
Have you ever laid awake at night wondering why your child is being targeted by others—or why some kids become bullies in the first place? Understanding bullying isn't just about identifying harmful behaviors; it's about uncovering the complex roots of this behavior so we can better protect our children and create lasting solutions.
Why Do Bullies Bully?
Content warning
Please be advised, the below article might mention trauma-related topics that include abuse which could be triggering to the reader. If you or someone you love is experiencing abuse, contact the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233). Support is available 24/7.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, approximately 20% of high school students reported having been bullied in the previous year.
Some people’s first experiences with bullying begin as early as kindergarten, and bullying often escalates at school in adolescence.
Have you ever wondered why bullies bully? What drives a child or teenager to torment other kids, especially in an era when we have so many anti-bullying campaigns?
In this article, we’ll explore the harsh reality of bullying and learn why some kids bully others. We’ll also look at the effects of bullying and offer resources for individuals who would like support for the mental health symptoms created by both mental and physical bullying.
What is bullying?
Bullying is a harmful behavior where individuals repeatedly intimidate or harm others in person or through social media platforms. Effective bullying prevention involves strategies and programs designed to educate and defend individuals from such negative behaviors, fostering a safer environment. The rise of social media has increased the prevalence and visibility of bullying, making it crucial to implement strong bullying prevention measures both online and offline.
What is a bully?
A bully is someone who is physically or verbally abusive to someone else or has repeatedly used manipulation or aggression to control another person. Although bullying can occur in adulthood, most cases of bullying involve children, especially in middle and high school. Bullying doesn’t just happen in person; it can also happen online—a phenomenon called cyber-bullying. Research shows that 33% of middle schoolers have experienced cyber-bullying, and one in six high school students (nearly 17%) experienced cyber-bullying in the last year.
We have all seen the heartbreaking consequences of bullying on the survivor, which can be as simple getting bad grades or as serious as having suicidal thoughts.*
* If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, please call the 988 Suicide And Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988. You can also use the online chat feature on the lifeline’s website.
Why do bullies bully?
When confronted with the harsh reality of violence and bullying, people commonly question the factors that cause it. For example, they might wonder if violent people were “born bad” or if they were negatively affected by something they experienced. Is it possible that some people are just bullies from birth? Experts and the media have debated this issue for many years, and the majority of professionals believe that bullies are made and not born.
Abuse
Research suggest that most bullies have actually experienced bullying or abuse at the hands of someone else. According to one study by the University of Washington and Indiana University, 97% of individuals who engaged in bullying had been bullied by others. In cases where a child experiences abuse at home and/or at school— and later goes on to bully others—traits such as sadism and aggression may be learned and absorbed at a young age. If no one intervenes and the child does not receive help, these traits can become core facets of a child’s personality and have a significant impact on their future behavior and relationships.
Insecurity
Given that many bullies are often abused at home or at school, insecurity can be a significant underlying factor that drives a bully’s behavior. When bullies are targeting their victims, they may seem powerful, dominant, or in control. However, this may be merely a facade. Many people put others down to make themselves feel strong.
If a child feels vulnerable, they may decide to pick on someone else in an effort to feel better about themselves. This may be especially true if they feel jealous of the person they decide to target. While these motivations do not excuse bullying, they may help researchers develop new insights into the psychology of bullies and learn how to help children who are at risk of becoming bullies.
Peer pressure
Many children also bully others as a result of peer pressure. Although they may not be inherently cruel themselves, they may go along with other bullies in search of acceptance from peers in their social circle. This desire to below can often drive kids to behave in cruel or uncharacteristic ways if they think it will give them the acceptance and admiration of their peers. Although this does not excuse bullying, it may help to be aware that peer pressure can be a powerful factor that motivates children to abuse their peers.
Why it’s important to understand bullies
Abuse, insecurity, and peer pressure are only a few of the factors that can lead someone to bully others, but these factors are among some of the most common. Understanding them can go a long way toward improving our understanding of bullies. This understanding may help to prevent—and ultimately eliminate—bullying.